One day Krickitt Carpenter said a humble little prayer. She knew that there was an amazing story resting in the details of her life and her marriage- and she knew that it was a story the world needs to know. That story grossed $41.7 million last weekend, to the surprise of even the studio executives. 

Ten weeks after their walk down the aisle, Kim and Krickitt Carpenter were in a severe car accident. Krickitt suffered extensive brain trauma and as a result, lost a significant amount of her memory- including any recollection of her husband at all. Today, twenty years later they are happily married with two children. Regardless of what the film does or doesn't portray about their journey back to marital bliss- anyone who has ever said "I do" knows just a touch of how hard that would be. 

If any two people ever had a legitimate reason to walk away from a marriage- it is them. 

But they did not. 

In an era where marriage is taken so lightly that just over 50% of people admit to thinking about their next wedding or spouse within a year of their aisle march- the commitment the Carpenters had is a little challenging to comprehend. 

"I did not fall back in love with my husband right away. It wasn't all hearts and flowers. It was hard. I had to make the decision to stay and to try, to work through it, because that is what I had promised God that I would do. Eventually the love did come and today I am very much in love with my husband. Love and marriage are choices..." 

How beautiful is that? 

Truly beautiful... 

Getting to talk with Kim and Krickitt was an amazing experience, for me. I was caught completely off guard by their generosity of spirit and kindness. I was beyond humbled by how supportive they were of a movie that- in it's details alone- seemed like an entirely different story. Their perspective was very much that it was God's story to begin with, and that they believed it was told the way it needed to be. 

As Kim talked about how very much alive, non-estranged, and present their parents have been- unlike the movie's character's parents- something struck me. Krickitt said a prayer, and thus they handed their story over to God to tell it as it needed to be told. Thankfully Kim and Krickitt's parents were there beside them and through their journey- but most of us can not relate to that. Most of us do sadly come from the estranged or broken home. So, even though that part of the movie wasn't accurate- it was likely very necessary. 

With the release of the film, the Carpenter's book was also re-released. I feel that, although the love story in the movie was lovely- their story is so much more amazing because it is real. I was honestly surprised to read a review posted to amazon that stated-  They're journey through this hardship seemed not very romantic and loving to say the least...

It is my sincerest hope that this story paves the path to heal hearts and marriages. I know that it is theirs as well because these are truly kind people. Easily one of the most inspiring couples I've ever spoken to... 

You guys have figured out, by now, how much I love movies. I would hope that, by now, you guys have also caught on to how passionate Chw and I are about marriage and saving/restoring marriages. As a sidenote, most people who read my blog know that I used to work the entertainment junket scene and have had the privileged of interviewing a good variety of celebrities... So-  

This past weekend I had the chance to see The Vow, starring Rachel McAdams and Channing Tatum. Let me back up a bit though. Roughly a month ago I read about the amazing real-life story of Kim and Krickitt Carpenter- whom the film was inspired by. Last week I caught Rachel McAdams on Ellen and found myself thoroughly impressed with how she continued to direct her answers back to Kim & Krickitt instead of simply promoting the film. That stuck with me, Saturday, as I watched The Vow. 

I left the film with definite mixed feelings. There were things I loved, and things I didn't. It was hard to examine it from an entertainment standpoint, knowing just a bit of the truth behind it's inspiration. What I did know was that so much was changed, and it made me really sad. {But, my 22 year old son was my date for the night and he loved it and wanted to cry- so there ya go.}

This morning I was blessed with the most amazing introduction to Valentines Day possible- I interviewed Kim and Krickitt Carpenter. I have to say, they are amazingly kind people to humor my blubbering and crying. I was about as unprofessional as I could have been, but that's ok. Their story has moved and inspired me so much. That their marriage was impacted as it was- and they CHOSE to move through it because they had made a vow- just moves me. {And, let the record state- I was far more starstruck by the two of them than any celebrity.} 

I am going to post a little bit more about my interview with the Carpenters tomorrow, but I just really wanted to take a minute- in relation to the film, to summarize something they said to me...

"Hollywood is Hollywood. We knew their would be changes but we really do love the movie. We thought Channing and Rachel did an amazing job. We know how hard they worked to get to know us and study us, and learn how we are. They tell our story, spot on, in that way..." 

I have a new respect for actors. Specifically, for these two. At the end of the day, it's a job. They do what they are told. Whether it is a true to life scene or not, they act it out because that's what they are being paid to do. They went beyond their job, and still are in the PR for the film. What a beautiful gift, from them, to feel so strongly about telling the truth... 

I totally need to rewatch The Vow... Have you seen it? What did you think? 

This time of year, you hear and see so much about love. 

it's every where. 

And it's kind of sweet, except that it's not really love. it's false stories about pretend people. It's heart shaped boxes and imaginary cupids with arrows and wings. It is songs written out of honesty, but containing only the deepest and best parts of the love itself- never the whole truth. 

Love can be witnessed through photographs in a coffee table album, but it can't ever live there. Thrive there. Die there. 

Love is a choice. It is not hateful words, months of selfish actions and then three little words said in a goodbye. Sometimes people want to love, but they can't see past themselves to do it. Sometimes. 

I am not perfect. I am not some poster parent by any means, but I have been learning a lot about love. 

Love IS non-judgemental. 

What that means is that there is no judgement about one's choices. What that does NOT mean, is that in place of judgement I will encourage them, embrace them (them being the choices), etc. 

Love IS un-conditional. 

What this means is that no actions, words, choices or anything will ever affect the love, change the love, alter the love or destroy the love. What that does NOT mean, is that the one who is loved has the right to use, abuse, lash out at, hurt, etc- the one(s) who love them. Un-conditional love does not mean becoming a door mat to the hostility of the ones you love. 

Love IS supportive. 

What this means is that, regardless of the choices or actions one makes, you will stand by them for who they are at the core of themselves. You will allow consequences to fall, but never waver in lifting them up and embracing them through it. What this does not mean is that you bail them out, embrace their belief that they bear no responsibility in what has occurred and reiterate how much of a victim that they are- enabling them further into the lie. 

Love IS ugly. And painful. 

It just is. Sometimes it's lovely and reaffirming, but often it isn't. It's hard, and it's lonely. it is always. it is forever. It consumes you and hurts you because the person(s) you love may not always love you back... but it doesn't matter because love is real and love is there. 

So sorry for the silence... 

It started because I had a massive migraine. 

Then it continued because my son Lucas is home on leave, from Germany, before he deploys.

Then it continued even more because my sweet puppy got incredibly sick. 

But, i finally slept last night and decided, upon waking, to let you know what's up- and then continue the silence until our little family unit survives the weekend... 

In the meantime- it is more important to steal a few minutes and see what's up with you?