The bad puns are linfinite.

Because TV is already your friend.

Always use protection when you're screwing yourself.

Chosen by a complex computer algorithm that simulates the sense of humor of a stoned 19-year-old.

Just say, "No," to hugs.

Gratuity is gratuitous.

She must have been typing something really important, like "LOL OMG!"

I fought the law and the law was a jerk face.

Oh, whoa, look!

In this episode of VHS, Yeardly Tinsley touches his students. Not necessarily in a good way.

I don't have a hidden agenda.

To be fair, nightmares are dreams, too.

Dan and David do a simple workout together.

What happens when a paleontologist loves a creationist?

Sing along! Actually no, just find my phone.

Start the morning with a gallon of joe.

The major penalties involve hot grease.

It's freezing cold under all these layers.