"Gonorrhea, one of the most common sexually transmitted diseases in the United States, is increasingly showing resistance to one of the last known effective antibiotic treatments, leading researchers from the Centers for Disease Control to "sound the alarm" about potentially untreatable forms of the disease."

-from here.

Syphilis still responds to penicillin - for now.

I tried to find out the numbers for you on how well condoms prevent these diseases, but I was unsuccessful. But if you look around you'll see that it's a long way from 100% effective. For herpes it doesn't help much:

They found that people who always used condoms had a 30% decreased risk of acquiring genital herpes when compared with people who never used condoms.

from here.

Also, most people who have herpes don't even know it, and something like 1 in 6 Americans has herpes.

I rarely meet anyone who knows these facts. Nearly everyone assumes that if they are using condoms then they are safe from all STD's. I think the public health establishment has really failed at educating people here.

ETA:

According to the workshop summary, "Scientific Evidence on Condom Effectiveness for Sexually Transmitted Disease (STD) Prevention," July 2001, The National Institute of Health and the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases report:

Condoms provide no reduction in the transmission of the human papilloma virus (HPV) and Trichomonas vaginalis.
Syphilis transmission is reduced 29% for typical use. It is reduced 50 to 71% when condoms are used correctly 100% of the time.
Gonorrhea and Chlamydia transmission is reduced by approximately 50% even when condoms are used 100% of the time.
Genital herpes transmission is reduced by approximately 40%
HIV transmission is reduced by approximately 85% when condoms are used correctly 100% of the time.

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Purchase the book, with all 10 years, pictures and diagrams and funny book-back quotes, here.

All content and concept created by Marisa Lenhardt unless otherwise stated. Copyright laws apply.

1) If you feel the need to tell me, within your first sentence to me, that you are a physicist, I hope you understand you won't be getting any.

2) "Let the lover be disgraceful, crazy, absentminded. Someone sober will worry about things going badly. Let the lover be." ~ Jelaluddin Rumi

3) A man who is not only willing to walk 60 miles with you to fight the disease that killed your mother, but who gets his mother to join in the walk, is pure gold.

4) Beware the only child. Undersocialization runs rampant, with everything requiring discussion (see VD list 2011, #1). Selfishness is pervasive.

5) Not like licking an ice cream cone. Like eating a peach.

6) Try fucking outside of your social circle every once in a while.

7) Men - when you go to move an animal off the bed to clear space for the sexins, gently placing them on the floor is sexier and may get you more head than kicking them off rudely.

8) Not sure what level of post-relationship comfort has been reached when you determine that you and your ex think the same girl is hot. It's not as awesome as the level where you get to tell him she's 14, though.

9) No joint email addresses. Except maybe for your wedding. If you're going to spend $40k on a single day, it's a comparatively small mistake in the scheme of things.

10) 1) Small dick
2) Impotence
Just two of many, many reasons it's a great idea to have sex on the first date. Waiting until 3-4 dates and a nice connection in means they'll KNOW bad sex was the reason you stopped seeing them.

11) Yes, if it's under 5 inches, you have to try harder. Life's rough.

12) Men are primal beings. Not having a firm handshake and not looking them in the eye when you meet is a recipe for a pissing contest.

13) Anyone who thinks my choice to travel is more selfish than their choice to breed hasn't done a carbon footprint comparison of both activities.

14) I don't have a problem with strip clubs. I don't have a problem with anyone going to strip clubs. I don't have a problem with anyone who goes to strip clubs hitting on me. I DO have a problem with people who spend so much time at strip clubs that they expect a non-stripper to respond the same way as a stripper does to your gross, hamfisted come-ons. Go sharpen your teeth elsewhere; there's not enough money in the world.

15) I'm glad you're happy now. I'm sorry I wasted all that time listening to your heartbroken bullshit when we really don't have a friendship to speak of. I'm a sucker.

16) I don't care what you call it. The first time my partner and I are invited to a breakfast double-date with you and your "just hanging out" friend, you are in a relationship.

17) A Mans Biggest Mistake Is Giving Another Man The Opportunity To Make His Woman Smile..(twitter:MartyFLawrence MartinNot lawrence)

18) Love is leaving multiple meals in the fridge so she doesn't starve while you're out of town.

19) Men - I don't care how good you think your aim is - don't put that disgusting carpet thing around your toilet. Instead of seeing the nast around the base of the toilet, we'll smell and, heaven forfend, feel, it first.

20) Which reminds me - yes, I did use the term "heaven forfend" and other big words before we met. Get over yourself.

21) In a long-term-relationship, you may have to remind your partner (ok, women... you're going to have to remind men) that it's not acceptable to attend a black-tie event in jeans, or to meet a new friend while wearing pyjamas. This is payment for all the times they make you dinner... right?
a. Yes, you'll have to make dentist and doctor's appointments. But it should mean you're never taking out the trash.

22) He will not respect you just because you tell him to respect you. Try NOT sleeping with him if he treats you like shit. That's where respect is born.

23) All men hate the smell of nail polish remover. Do it in another room.

24) A whirlwind romance will not teach you to communicate with someone, to court them, to pick up on any of their signals, or get to know them until you're in too deep.

25) Once you've won the argument and gotten your way, you do not additionally get to pout because your partner is unhappy about the outcome. Cook a nice meal and give head.

26) The number of times you say "we need to talk" is inversely proportional to the amount you're getting laid.

27) He really, really doesn't care that she's dumb.

28) Dear men - no, you are not allowed an opinion on women in labor, their choices or their actions. Dear women not currently in labor - your opinion is also irrelevant.

29) You don't need to say "crazy vegan ex". You can just say "vegan ex".

30) I hate it, but it works. Compliment my intelligence, my writing skills, my motorcycling skills... anything other than "wow, you have a great voice" and "you're pretty".

31) It's over when he stops putting a mug of coffee on your nightstand in the morning.

32) Take a step back from being hurt that he's not in love with you to realize that you're not in love with him.

33) Yes, if you fuck your boss, you will get a promotion/raise. Sorry, ladies - this is, indeed, the way the world works.

34) A crossover from the performer rule list - if you feel the need to do something stupid like sleep with someone with whom you're performing, wait until the week before the show closes. That way, by the time the run is over, you'll be able to appropriately extricate yourself.

35) Even if you're both in happy monogamous relationships with other people, hearing that he remembers what you were wearing that time you kissed almost a decade ago will make you smile in all the right places.

36) Hearing that your least favorite ex was outed on the internet as having contracted an STD after you were together is like Christmas.

37) We like to see women naked. We like to see men naked if we're going to fuck them.

38) American men don't know how to flirt and American women are easy. It's a catch-22 which means that American women are going to get laid like crazy abroad and American men will only get laid by American women. And Aussies.

39) The first unprotected sex after an AIDS test is like taking a crap right after you shower - you won't feel really clean again until your next shower.

40) Sex. Cheaper and more effective than couples counseling. If it doesn't work, increase frequency. Caveat - has to be with your partner.

41) What are your three favorite things about your partner, that make you smile when you think of them? Don't have three? It's over.

42) It's a sad fact that every woman needs to be able to sprint.

43) That guy who avoids confrontation and refuses to admit when he's wrong? You've got yourself a beta male, right there.

44) Dear ex who said "shouldn't you be getting over this by now?" 6 months after my mother's death - thank you for setting the bar so low for helping my partner through such a difficult time. It takes so little to be comparatively awesome.

45) I tried to throw out the inscribed journal you gave me (I can't imagine having wanted to use it even when we were together), but I filled it with lists of the things I hate about you, so now it's too funny to throw away. Thanks for that.

46) The initial meeting is luck. Everything else is how hard you work at it. Some work is fun, but a healthy relationship isn't "luck".

47) He will always have one solid response when you ask him what you can do to make him feel better. You need to be willing to do it.

48) No, I'm not going to hang out or otherwise interact with you beyond what's necessary if your woman is a psycho jealous bitch. It's not that I'm worried I couldn't take her. It's that she's gutless and her sniping comments lead me to believe she's the kind of woman who would set fire to my house rather than approach me directly to air a grievance.

49) Save the "be more open-minded, try polyamory" speech for a girl in her 20's on whom it might work.

50) Romance matures with a relationship. Flowers and chocolate are lovely in the beginning. Later, rubbing your feet and bringing you a glass of wine when you've had the world's shittiest day is one of the most romantic things in the world.

51) I hate relationships, but I love being with Luke.

All years here.

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Inteview (NSFW) with my friend expanding_x_man about his controversial memoir about transitioning from female to male, The Testosterone Files.

This is a great book, and I recommend it. It definitely changed my view of men. It's funny, honest, and a good read. (It is very graphic though.)

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People tend to die of one of two things - illness, or an accident. A few of the very fortunate will die of old age, in their beds, while asleep. Odds are this is not what happened. If so, mazel tov. If you were close to the deceased, you are not a person who needs to ask "how", because you know. If you were not close enough to know, you do not need to know. Your curiosity may FEEL as though it is killing you but, trust me, you will survive this. You will ask how the person died. If the response is cancer, you will ask what kind. If it was lung/mouth/esophageal/throat/anything like that, you will ask whether the deceased was a smoker. If the answer is yes, you will make a tsking sound. If the response to the first question is "motorcycle accident", you will skip straight to the tsking. Or, you will ask if the deceased was drinking. Allow me to remind you of the following: You are not Jesus, and you are not God. You cannot resurrect, and you are not fit to judge. In the 80's and 90's in San Francisco, if someone was found out to have had HIV or AIDS, the next immediate question was "Are they gay?", as if a person who got it through a blood transfusion was somehow more deserving of health than someone who enjoyed regular ass-poundings in a bathhouse. Fuck your judgment. It does not matter HOW the person died, only THAT they died. Acceptable questions are "Was it sudden?" or "Was it expected?" This will give more depth to your empathy. I'm convinced that the true reason behind the judging line of questioning is humankind's fear of dying. Don't worry - you'll get there in the blink of a redwood's eye. And, whatever's on the other side, it won't matter how you got there.

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Canadian new wave! I will admit I forgot all about this record. I had to clean the needle three times there was so much dust on it. And there are only 4 songs!

I was going to just dismiss this as generic, overly enunciated new wave. But after the second listen it really started growing on me. It is New Wave with capital NW. Everything takes Eff-ort! and clever E-NUN-c-ation!

OMG there’s a vid for “Flat Tireâ€!
[ http://lj-toys.com/?auth_token=sessionless%3A1329685200%3Aembedcontent%3A478458%2690%26%3Adeb85143da45e5933561e3d3602d0133eee7b390

Smash that radio! Shoot out that tire! Burn that gas station!

Heck, this 7†is even kinda catchy. You could have danced to it with stripes and a skinny tie back in the day. “I’m a SPONGE! I SOAK up every-THING!†C’mon it was 1979. Things were out-of-sorts back then and the future looked bleak. Slightly detached, almost ironic dance music was what folks needed to feel better.

Rating: An ear fungus that grows a little with every listen

(It's been awhile so I will remind you all, dear readers, that this is part of a series. You can click the tag below to read them all)

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